


Broken And Bruised

by writing_and_procrastinating



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, F/M, So much angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-06
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-13 00:52:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16882521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writing_and_procrastinating/pseuds/writing_and_procrastinating





	Broken And Bruised

Everything around you was an absolute blur, people rushing around while you all heard dull shouts and shots, sounding like they were miles away and yet so near. Emergency lights were flashing above you, bathing the hallway in red as agents scrambled to get rid of the invaders that were flowing through the massive hole in the wall all while you were laying on the ground, unable to move, to defend yourself or to call for help, parts of the wall laying on top of you, slowly crushing you underneath their weight. You felt like you couldn’t breathe, the edges of your vision slowly fading away and your head rolling to the side, all energy leaving your body when you suddenly felt like a heavy weight was lifted off your body.  
“I got you, doll,” the smooth voice of your boyfriend sounded strained as he lifted another piece of rubble from your body. Slowly he pulled you out from underneath the debris after he uncovered your body. And even though you didn’t feel like you were being crushed to death by a truck anymore you still felt your body giving out, a little trickle of blood running from your the corner of your mouth. Eyes heavy and body numb you were starting to slip away into the darkness, not realising that Bucky had lifted you up, his metal arm cold against your hot and clammy skin as he hurried towards the med bay.  
“Don’t close your eyes! Stay with me! Come on, love!” Bucky said, voice desperate and eager, trying to keep you awake.  
“Bucky, I-“ your murmur was interrupted by violent coughs shaking your body, your lungs burning while every cell in you felt like it was on fire. With every passing moment, you felt yourself being drawn closer to unconsciousness, blood rushing through your ears as your head was thrown back and forth due to Bucky sprinting through the seemingly endless hallways of the compound.  
“We’re nearly there, (Y/N), don’t close your eyes now, come on, keep ‘em open,” your boyfriend panted while bursting through the doors of the med bay, busy with injured people, nurses and doctors. One of the nurses came running towards you, pulling a stretcher behind her for Bucky to lay you on top of it. You felt a harsh yank going through your body as your gurney was pushed towards the operation room, leaving your boyfriend and a nurse behind.  
“She’s in good hands, Mr Barnes. We have a room for family and friends where you can wait.” The nurse, whose name tag read Amy in bold letters, lead him into an unfriendly, clean white room.

Hours went by, people passing the tall man in a blur while he drank coffee after coffee to keep himself awake, to keep himself alert.  
“Mr Barnes?” the soft voice of nurse Amy bought him back to reality, his head shooting up, hope filling his eyes.  
“Miss (Y/L/N) is out of the operation room now. She’s still asleep and for her safety will be kept in an artificial coma for a few days until she’s stable. Do you want to see her?”  
“Please,” Bucky’s voice was low and raspy from the hours he spend not using it. He quickly got up from his seated position to follow the young woman who lead him in front of door that looked like every other in the hallway, beside the fact that he could see you through the window in the door, laying underneath a white blanket, tubes and wires sticking out of your broken and bruised body. Bucky hesitated, afraid to open the door, the possibility of this being a dream and you being dead lurking in the back of his mind.  
“Go ahead, you can talk to her.”  
He looked over his shoulder to see Amy giving him a reassuring smile before he turned back to the door, his hand resting on the handle. Taking in a deep breath he pushed the handle down, opening the door and walking inside where he was greeted by the rhythmic beeping of the different machines around you. Sitting down beside you he felt tears rising up behind his eyes, not being able to process seeing you in a state like this, looking like you were going to leave him any second.  
“Please don’t leave me,” he whimpered, leaning forward to rest his arms on your bed, his head supported by his hands as sobs shook his body, making him look like a little boy instead of the agent and Avenger he had become.

The next few days he spend by your side, holding your hand, talking to you, begging you to wake up, for him, for your friends and for the team. Several people had walked into the room, Steve and Sam for instance, but Bucky didn’t realise any of them coming and leaving, all he cared about was you and only you. He didn’t sleep, barely ate and only left the room to go to the toilet, his walk slow and sluggish, eyes bloodshot, his face pale and his hair an absolute mess. After taking a bathroom break he walked through the hallways the blinding white lights hurting his eyes as he wiped his wet hands on his pants due to there not being any paper towels in the restroom. Turning the corner to enter the hallway in which your room was located, Bucky was greeted by the sight of doctors and nurses hurrying into your room, the squeaking of their shoes echoing along with their urgent voices. Upon seeing the scenario in front of him, Bucky’s steps speed up, rushing to get to your room only to be stopped by a nurse standing before the door.  
“You can’t go in there, sir,” she protested, somehow able to keep him from entering the room, however, he was able to look over her head, seeing the doctors and nurses fumbling with all kinds of different machines, rapid wild beeping of heart monitor ringing in his ear as you were flatlining right in front of his eyes.

Several hours went by, hours spent with his head in his hands, sitting on one of the uncomfortably hard plastic chairs in the hallway before your room, his elbows resting on his knees as he thought about all the different possible outcomes of this situation, a great majority of them having a bad ending. He saw what you looked like when they rolled your bed past him back into the operation room, skin covered in sweat and looking like you were gone for good already. At some point Steve had joined him, not leaving his side, refusing to do so, his hand was either on his best friends back or he was busy pacing around the hallway, asking passing doctors and nurses if they had any news for the two men.  
“She’ll be fine, Buck. She’s strong, we all know that” the blonde tried to reassure the brunette but it was no good, Bucky was sinking deeper and deeper into worrying about you, his hands tugging on his hair, frustration taking over him.  
“Mr Barnes?”  
He looked up with hopeful eyes, standing up to stand before the doctor, Steve joining him and standing beside him.  
“I’m sorry, Mr Barnes, but Ms (Y/L/N) didn’t make it. Her internal wounds were too severe and-“ the doctor continued to talk but his voice got drowned out by the blood rushing through Bucky’s ears, his mind drifting off, not really being able to process the news of his girlfriend being dead. Gone. Forever. He couldn’t accept that, he didn’t want too.  
“Bucky…” Steve’s voice shot through his haziness, the hand on his shoulder pulling him out of his thoughts.  
“She’s…she’s gone?” He felt like a little boy all over again, his eyes filled with tears, voice quiet as he turned his head to look at his best friend.  
“I’m sorry, Buck.”  
After he said those words Bucky couldn’t keep it together anymore, his walls crashing down as he openly began to cry, his sobs shaking his body as Steve pulled him to his chest, hugging his best friend while tears were rolling down his own face in reaction to the loss of one of his best and closest friends. You were the light of their lives, always there to brighten their days, help them through the rough patches, getting them adjusted to the newer times and just being there for them. The small ring box in Bucky’s pants felt heavier than ever, reminding him of the words he wanted to say to you on the day the Avengers base was attacked, reminding him of all that his life could’ve been and could’ve become. Remind him of the death of the love of his life.

\-------------

His body jolted upwards, the blanket falling from his bare chest in the process as it heaved up and down with quick, shallow breaths, his heart beating rapidly in it causing his blood to rush through his ears.  
“Babe?”  
A tiny voice called out beside him, a hand patting the mattress in search for his hand which was soon found.  
“Another nightmare?”  
All he could do was to nod, tears clouding his vision as the previously seen images flashed before his eyes as he clenched them together, trying to stop the tears from leaving his eyes. The sheets next to his rustled as you sat up, your hand squeezing his’ as you moved closer to him.  
“It’s okay, I’m here,” you reassured him, knowing what his nightmares were about by now and that he mostly all he needed was to hold you to make sure you were there, alive and breathing. The scars on your legs were still visible, and they would be until the day you’d take your last breath, which only reminded your boyfriend of all that could’ve happened, of the possibility of you being dead. After all, for all you both knew, you were pretty close to it after the events of a few months ago.  
“I got you, Bucky. I’m right here and I’m not going to leave any time soon.”  
Your hand carefully moved to his back, rubbing soothing circles on it while he leaned his head on your shoulder, the wetness of his tears coating your skin.  
“I don’t wanna lose you,” he murmured, his voice quiet, shaking with sadness and fear.  
“You won’t. I promise you that.”  
After a few moments, in which Bucky had calmed down a bit, you moved to lay back down, your back pressed against the soft mattress while Bucky moved his head onto your chest, your fingers playing with his hair the way you knew he loved. Moments like these weren’t necessarily something you expected entering your relationship with the ex-soldier but that didn’t mean you minded them. You didn’t mind being the big spoon, taking care of your boyfriend, especially when he had nightmares are panic attacks and the fact that he trusted you enough to show you his vulnerable and insecure side only strengthened the relationship between the two of you.  
“I love you, (Y/N).”  
“I love you too, Bucky. Now try to get some more sleep, love,“ you said, continuing to stroke his head, the diamond ring on your finger twinkling as the dim light coming from the window hit it, reminding you of the promise you soon would be able to give him. With a soft smile on your face, thinking about how you were going to spend the rest of your life with the man you loved, you joined Bucky by drifting off into a peaceful sleep.


End file.
